Not a Mom. Pees on Balls.

mom007: hi
sailorobinson: hi
mom007: ho are yu
sailorobinson: good
mom007: where are yu
mom007: allo
mom007: yu are hier
mom007: alo
mom007: oisvqhoivSH
mom007: IUGUHUO
sailorobinson: eh
mom007: KJhoshOIU
mom007: UHOUHOH
sailorobinson: go away
mom007: WHY
sailorobinson: because i dont want to talk to you?
mom007: SPEAAAAAAAAAAAAK
sailorobinson: GO AWAY
mom007: %%%% OFF
sailorobinson: you fu.ck off
mom007: I WANT TO %%%% YU
sailorobinson: I don't do guys with small dicks
mom007: I HAVE A BIG......
sailorobinson: i doubt it
sailorobinson: you pee on your balls
mom007: i like the anal sex
sailorobinson: most fa.gs do
sent sound: artillery
sent sound: dog-drink
mom007: fuc yu
sent sound: doorcreak
sailorobinson: no
mom007: go a way
sailorobinson: gladly.

More adventures from the land of 'Tard.

I got this message from some dude in the middle east. Turkey or something.

TB: Turkey Boy
CR: Me *waves*

TB: hi
CR: hi
TB: asl
CR: look at my profile you twit
TB: please
TB: im new here
CR: No, if youcant be bothered to check my profile....
CR: No you arent.
CR: you ve messaged me a couple times in the past month.
CR: and youve been on this site since october.
CR: Ive been on this site less time then you and i know how to do it.
CR: So go away
CR: liar
TB: but its not my adress
CR: i so don't care.
TB: im chat in box of my boyfreind
CR: is that your picture?
TB: no
CR: yeah, right.
CR: leave me alone
TB: ok
TB: bye bye
TB: you are not cute
CR: i dont try to be.
CR: you are an ugly motherfu.kcer
TB: ok thank you
TB: very mutch
CR: GOD LEAVE ME ALONE
TB: bye

I guess it could have been worse. I don't get these gems that often any more, because most of them know I am a basher anyway of those who are foreign. :D
I draw the line at Canada, Australia, and Anywhere in Europe; although those are subjected to stupidity as well.

So... want to know what is going on that doesn't involve retarded emails or transexual conversations?

Girl 1 turned three last week. Girl 2 wants to potty train, and I know it, however, (and I emphasize that comma) it has been nearly six months since we began trying to sit her ass on the pot. We put the both of them in day care because Husband needs to get off his ass and find a job (I pay for the daycare, of course) and the baby sitter informed me today that she is giving up on potty training her.
Mmmkay. Guess Girl 1 is going to kindergarten in a pull-up.

Girl 2 is a pain in the ass lately. This attitude crap is getting old... She was supposed to be the good one.

Oh, oh oh. Big News. I am going to be out of a job next week. Yeah. Apparently, Cubicle Hell Inc. pulled the funding on my job, so Cubicle Rat will become Homeless Mouse. Or Something.

But....

I found this out all after my manager told me he wants to put me in for another job down stairs (no more elevator, w00t!) It pays 2 bucks more an hour, and I get away from the scandalous retired people here.

Husband still needs a job.

Setting: Outside the building, talking to Nosy while she smokes a cigarette.

Nosy: Hey, look at that girl walking over there. isn't she pretty? She is walking like she is hot shit. I betcha she has herpes.
Cubicle Rat: :Pisses self laughing::
Nosy: What, she does!
Cubicle Rat: Yeah, probably. She just flipped her hair. I bet she is taking Va1trex.
Nosy: ::Pisses self laughing::
CR: See, there she goes, nah nah nah, I take Va1trex, you don't!
Nosy: Look at the lesbian girl over there looking at herpes girl.
CR: Yeah, she probably is thinking, "That damn bitch, she gave me herpes".

Not Funny? You had to be there.

My Cause of Death Revealed!!!!



http://www.thedeathpsychic.com/prediction.asp?u9361

This is an actual email I got today at work.


From: Head Cubical Hell Cheese
Sent: Tuesday, January 08, 2008 10:21
To: All Sheep in the email list
Subject: Using Cones to reserve a parking space.
All,

The Cubical Hell, Inc. employee parking spaces are provided on a first come first serve bases. This does not mean you can place an orange cone or any other item in the space when you leave for lunch or for the day and expect the space to still be there when you get back. Any and all items used to block a parking space will be confiscated by the security office.

R/

Head Cheese
Security Director
Cubical Hell, INC


Hey, it is more entertaining then the email I got last week about the meeting we are having about the meeting next week...

*Sigh*


Also: I overheard this about 5 minutes ago:

Random Stuffed Shirt: Hey, Nosy, shred these papers for me!
Nosy: (looks at shredder two feet to RSS's left)... Shred your own shit, I ain't your mexican!

It's cold. 19 degrees in Florida. WTF???